“Blinded by the light” or “Excuse me while I whip this out”

I think it is time to retire the groundhog and initiate a new mascot as the harbinger of spring. My vote would be for my neighbor. Let’s call him Mr. Wilson. Mr. Wilson is a very old, very white man who of course loves to do his lawn work. Hell, he’s retired, what else does he do?

Why should Mr. Wilson be the new prognosticator of spring?

Here’s why. Mr. Wilson has the uncanny ability to start wearing shorts while it is still cold out, but right before it starts to get warm. I don’t know if he is the Old Farmer of Almanack fame or what, but his ability to unveil his pasty white legs before anybody else has near clock-like precision with the coming of warmer weather. So from now on, let’s just eat the hedgehog and keep some cameras aimed at Mr. Wilson’s door. As soon as you see the sun reflecting off his bone white legs, spring is coming.

For those of you who are fans of thehotlibrarian.blogspot.com (as all of you should be) she recently had a list of unanswered questions. I cannot stand unanswered questions, and will be doing my “research” to get to the bottom of each and every one of them. If you have any other questions let me know.